Summer's radiance and Winter's bitterness
by Miasmatic
Summary: Setsura's POV. "My love for him will remain as the deceitful guile that has ensnared me for all eternity."


**Hi everyone. This is my first Nurarihyon no Mago fanfic. I hope you'll enjoy it. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Nurarihyon no Mago**

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><p><strong><span>Setsura's POV<span>**

How foolish am I. How could I not be aware of the sad living that the future provides me?

_Was it my fault that I fell in love with him?_

_Or was it his fault for falling in love with her?_

Foolish! Yet I still fuss over this frivolous matter that has no meaning at all.

_What was so attractive about him?_

_Why was he so compelling?_

His smoldering golden eyes were stunning. His smirk was mischievous yet gorgeous at the same time. He possessed the true qualities of a leader.

A glance of him made you hanker for more. His smooth velvet-like voice rippled firmly along the boisterous chimes of non-sense.

_Are you in love or are you just foolishly infatuated of him?_

Nonsense! What captivated me so much about him was his courage. Dauntlessly, he strides his way firmly across any path of arduous obstacles.

Just watching him made my heart thump fiercely. That is why I chose to follow him.

To pursue him and to take his hand and walk with him side by side.

_That's your conviction of him. But what is his conviction of you? You barely know if he insensitively labels you as his subordinate._

Even so, my loyalty to him cannot be taken back. I have sworn my loyalty to him through the exchange of sakazuki.

Such solemn pledge cannot be broken.

All I can do in my pathetic state is to support him with every ounce of strength I can muster.

My unrequited love for him will remain strong until the time when my body rots.

Only I am to blame for my rash actions.

But now, it is too late. My love for him will remain as the deceitful guile that has ensnared me for all eternity.

No matter how much I regret for it, none shall change.

The reason is, as his subordinate, I am only supposed to follow him. Never can I keep up with his pace and walk alongside him.

And the only task as his subordinate is to adhere to him with unwavering loyalty and strength.

I should have not been too smitten for him.

My mistakes shall be the imperishable stain that tinges me through out my life relentlessly, symbolizing my foolish love.

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><p>When Rihan was sired, I felt a pang of pain pierce my heart. Seeing Nurarihyon and Youhime together now with an offspring made me flare with envy.<p>

Gritting my teeth, I ball my fist furiously to control my unravelled feelings from leaking out any further.

Watching Nurarihyon taking care of his son irritated me greatly. For heaven's sake, what kind of father brings his son overnight to all kinds of places and brings him back with kiss marks?

As I observed the married couple, Youhime scolded Nurarihyon fiercely with teary eyes. Well, not that fiercely. It wasn't her type to be enraged.

If I were Youhime, I would of froze the hell out of that lousy father.

I heave an exasperated sigh of relief and resume with my daily chores.

The other time, Nurarihyon confronted me with Rihan dangling haphazardly on his sinewy hands.

"Yo, Yuki-Onna! Rihan peed. What should I do?" Nurarihyon asked in a care-free tone.

"Hmm.. Why don't I freeze the hell out of you idiot-father-and-son?" I suggested darkly. Nurarihyon threw me a questioning look. He parted his lips to speak but was interrupted by the sudden gasp of Youhime. Her eyes were wide and teary with shock. Stunned, Nurarihyon stammered, trying to find the words to explain.

"Ayakashi-sama!" yelled Youhime. She didn't look fearsome at all. I stared at Nurarihyon who was frantically panicking in fright.

The other small yokais were quivering in fear as they saw the frail princess scold the Lord of Pandemonium who cowered and begged for forgiveness.

What was so fearsome of her? Maybe she looked scary to them but to me, she was just a frail human princess.

I turn my back and begin to exit the room.

"W-w-wait! Yuki-Onna!" I glance steadily at the person who called out to me, it was Youhime. I directed a questioning glance upon her.

"Calling her Yuki-Onna is a drag." Nurarihyon said "Call her Setsura instead. I bet she'll like it."

"But ayakashi-sama, the last time you called her that, she froze the whole room." protested Youhime.

I didn't need her reiteration of that event. How can Nurarihyon spout such nonsense after Youhime's upbraiding?

"Well, she should get used to it." Nurarihyon insisted.

"Nurarihyon, I prefer that calling me Yuki-Onna is much suitable." I exclaimed firmly.

Without waiting for their response, I exit the room hastily.

As soon as I reached the exit, I walk to a halt as soon as I heard Nurarihyon say: "Setsura, after you're done with the laundry. Go cook our food."

I stop in my tracks, suddenly stiffening at his commanding words. A half of me told me to smack him with a block of ice. Anger soared and engulfed me like a raging flood.

Then, it had dawned upon me that I was no more than just his subordinate. If I hadn't held back, what would have happened to me?

"Hai..." I mumbled under my breath. It was muted from Nurarihyon's location. Youhime stared at me with concern, shifting her focus to Nurarihyon.

"Speak louder, damn it! If you're-"

"Ayakashi-sama!" Youhime yelled "Can't you see that she's been troubled since you have been in charge of Rihan and yet you still loan her with this laborious work?"

Stunned with her sudden outburst, Nurarihyon wasn't able to gather any strength to respond to her.

"You can rest for now." Youhime said, angling her head to my direction. "Don't mind Ayakashi-sama."

The very reason why I cannot despise Youhime with great passion was because she was too lenient.

No wonder why Nurarihyon was immediately enthralled by her. Just being with her made his world shine brighter.

Her happiness was his and the whole clan's too. But that did not apply to me.

In fact, it was the opposite. And now I feel ashamed of myself.

Her happiness was my sadness combined with jealousy. Even though that I have been mulling to myself how feeble she was, she still remained firm.

She always had an ambience fraught with pleasance and cheerfulness. We were opposites. I was and probably am vile and malevolent.

What if Youhime found out that I have been resenting and envying her? Would she act differently towards him?

I shake my head firmly. My presence isn't need here. I should leave.

Before I did so, I faced Youhime and took a deep breath.

"Thank you."

As soon as those words came out of my mouth, I retreated immediately, not looking back.

Maybe I should smile more often and be more cheerful towards others.

But not for the sake for Nurarihyon's love, but to attract others the way Youhime does.

Impossible. I shouldn't get my hopes up. If I try to succeed, I may end up failing once again.

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><p>"Ayakashi-sama, Yuki-Onna seems rather upset." Youhime said in a concerned tone.<p>

"Oh, really?" Nurarihyon said, he was reluctant and not showing much enthusiasm.

"Aren't you worried about her?" Youhime asked sternly.

"Well, the woman I only care about is you." Nurarihyon exclaimed.

He expected a flush of pink to cross Youhime's face but instead he heard a vexed huff.

"Aren't you impressed by my flattery?" Nurarihyon spouted presumptuously.

"Well, Ayakashi-sama, I'm concerned about Yuki-Onna." Youhime said "Take care of Rihan until I come back."

Youhime then exited the room to search for Sestura. It wasn't that hard to find her. Youhime was glad for that.

"Yuki-Onna." Youhime called out. Setsura was in front of the Sakura tree. It's pink petals fluttered gracefully in the air.

Setsura focused her attention to the lady that had called her. They myriad of cherry blossoms enhanced Youhime's ephemeral beauty even more.

A pang of jealousy began to pierce Sestura's heart as she thought so. It almost seemed that jealousy was now becoming her habit.

She should prevent that as soon as possible. But she didn't know how.

"What are you doing here?" Setsura asked mildly

"Well, I thought that Ayakashi-sama hurt your feelings so I came here to see if you were alright." Youhime replied.

The jealousy then subsided as if a wave had extinguished the flames. The envy was replaced by happiness.

"I'm fine." assured Setsura. Her envy of Youhime began to ebb away quickly.

It then dawned upon the snow maiden that she, too, can be like her. Despite Youhime resembling the summer and Sestura the embodiment of winter.

Summer may be warm and radiant, the exact opposite of winter. But winter had its own beauty too.

Nurarihyon chose her because his world was as dark as the night sky. No stars, no light, no sun. Youhime was the perfect piece to his puzzle.

She wasn't loved by him since Nurarihyon was heartless to begin with, both figuratively and literally.

With a smile, Setsura decided to let go and to forget the past and embrace the present. She can no longer turn back now. The only option for her is to walk straight forward.

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><p><strong>So, what do you think about it? Please review. <strong>


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